The Horned Melon is an exotic fruit that looks scary on the outside, but is actually very tasty and goes great with alcohol.
      It's a great fruit to describe some of the best people in news. They're blunt, gruff, rarely smile, and are what some may call "unwelcoming" to newbies ...and  to change in general. But, like the actual Horned Melon, on the inside these people are the most refreshing and welcomed of exotic types.
      If you talk to them for more than 5 minutes, you soon realize that their dry humor is hilarious and though they may not welcome change, they are highly adaptable because they're willing to do whatever's necessary to support the team. The Horned Melon's supposedly "unwelcoming" nature only comes from the fact that they want to do their job well and any change to the nature of their job means that they need to review their current methods so as to adjust. And adjust, they will.
​      These types are dependable, incredibly insightful, honest, and kind. Also, like the Horned Melon, they're a lot of fun when paired with a drink or two ...or three...or eight.  

   The coconut is built for tough environments and its seemingly impenetrable exterior does an excellent job at protecting the wealth of what's hidden at its core. This describes some of the most interesting people in the newsroom. These types do smile a lot. They say hello to everyone and are quick to give you a pat on the back when you've done something well. They will also pull you aside to let you know when you've stepped out of line.
     Coconuts are typically a bit older and willing to play an almost "parental" role in an industry dominated by entitled millennials (and I say this as one such whiny millennial). The coconut has endured a lot, is well-traveled, and has had to fight for everything they have. Their struggles haven't left them with fractured armor. Their struggles have made them smarter, stronger, and more empathetic.
     These tough but lovely people are usually highly religious or spiritual. They use their spirituality to keep them grounded and smiling. They're my favorite type : )    

      Grapes are sweet, small, and delightful. But they're not built for a tough environment. At least not yet. They're typically young and not used to standing on their own. They may be working in news because, at their core, they love story-telling. What they've truly wanted is to pursue this love through writing fiction, acting, or some other creative avenue. But somehow, they've ended up in news.
     They're sensitive, generous, adorable and they make the greatest of friends. Grapes will either adjust to the current douche-like nature of the news industry or they will leave for greener pastures...and you will cry when they leave because any place that these types grace with their presence is benefited by their kindness and generosity.  

     The durian is a tricky fruit. Depending on who you're speaking to, it's either the greatest thing in the world or the most despicable thing on the planet. When you first meet a durian, you don't know what to make of the weird looking thing. It's almost alien. You're curious, so you inspect it...and then you realize that what's inside of it literally smells like a rotting corpse. 
     The durians of the news room are untrustworthy because they will do anything to promote themselves and their careers. They have an insatiable need to achieve and be admired. To feed this appetite, the durian will befriend whomever they must.  
     When you first meet a durian, despite their perfectly groomed appearance, you will notice that something about them is "off" ...and you're not quite sure if you trust them. But you will ignore this warning in your gut because they smile a lot and seem so gosh-darn friendly. As months go by, you will slowly notice that the durian's every word and supposedly friendly gesture is calculated. And then one day it hits you: This person is playing a game, and the goal of their game is to be the news room's top dog, at any cost.
     To some people in news, this cutthroat tendency is admirable. Some people will love durians for their ability to deceive. Others, like me, are not fans of self-centered ghouls who fake friendships in hopes of moving their own career goals forward. 

     Yellow Star Fruit is thin-skinned, sour to taste, smelly, and it can be deadly to people with weak kidneys. 
      Star Fruits who work in news are similarly thin-skinned and rude people whose cruel nature is infectious to those around them...sort of like a bad smell that becomes increasingly worse overtime.  
They were not born this way. Over the years, some very bad things happened to them. Unlike the Coconuts, who learned strength and kindness from their bad experiences, the Star Fruit's lack of discipline and self-focused nature leads them to become a disturbingly bitter and acerbic person. 
     The Star Fruit's sensitive nature makes it prone to extreme feelings of jealousy and anger. On a near daily basis, they express these feelings by yelling to the point of veins popping out of their foreheads, engaging in harmful gossip, aggressive behavior, and in frequent attempts to undermine the well-being of those around them.
     Star Fruit make up a large population within  the news industry, and they are often in positions of authority. Sadly, it is not uncommon for them to struggle with severe drinking and/or drug/sexual addictions. They often work in teams with Durians.
     So, these types are difficult to work with, but the fact that they are such highly-sensitive people means there's hope for them to change. I think guidance from the right Coconut would do the trick.
     But I am definitely not a Coconut, so I avoid the Star Fruit as much as I can.