Confidence: a feeling of self-assurance arising from one's appreciation of one's own abilities or qualities.
Similarly, self-confidence -or awareness and personal ownership of one's talent and abilities- is essential to those who desire to find success in their careers and personal lives. A person who knows what they're good at sort of walks around with these talents stamped to them like an invisible tattoo. Their self-confidence, evident in their mannerisms, tone, and carriage, tells other people who they are and what they're capable of. This lets society know what to expect of them. On the other hand, a person who lacks self-confidence has no calling-card- their identity is fuzzy to on-lookers. And when society doesn't know what to think of a person, they often fear that person and sometimes even label them "an outcast."
This is why self-confidence is vital to success in the world of adulting- our self-confidence tells other people (at work, for example) that we are a valuable and contributing member of the team.
So, this makes me wonder about those of us who are not in possession of self-confidence. Is there any hope for us? I honestly don't know the answer to that ...
I'm not a confident person. I've lived long enough and failed hard enough to realize that I'm as far from perfect (or even from "capable") as a person can be. This has taught me that I don't have any reason to be confident. That sounds terrible. But it's the truth. Yet, when I explain this to friends who say, "You should be more confident," they tell me I'm being too negative. I understand why they feel this way seeing as my sentiments do sound horribly negative. But I think I'm just being realistic. Why should I fool myself into thinking that I'm better than I really am? Wouldn't that be kind of insane? But, this makes me wonder if successful people are masters of doing exactly that ... do they fool themselves into believing that they're capable of amazing and near-impossible feats and then that's where their ability to do said near-impossible feats comes from? Do we have to lie to ourselves to succeed?
Of course, a lot of successful people are either extremely good-looking or extremely intelligent or a combination of both (or neither, and simply born into wealth and privilege) and this sends them on a trajectory towards good fortune. So, I guess my question of self-confidence and its correlation to success is centered around people who are fairly ordinary in appearance and intelligence- does it take fooling oneself to attain success?
Once again, I don't know the answer to this. I decided to blog about this in the hope that I would discover the answer while writing ...but that hasn't happened yet. I guess this is just one of those subjects I'll have to keep thinking about.